Devil Gang proudly presents......

It's a bell-ends life, and story

In a dark cold raining night a warrior appeared who had a white tail between two of his hands. His head was really huge and looked like a giant torpedo with a penis and a vagina and a little bit of ass which was swollen due to fucking a Scouser who was involved in a fight with Aaron Lennon who punched a DJ who was playing Jingle bells and suddenly Santa Claus had a wank with the help of an elf who also spanked the living daylights and stars out of the bell-end which was nice but also it was known as 'The Great Khali' with a tiny body with no balls and a T-shirt which said I'm gay and also a pair of wobbly tits which had nipples so huge that it could fit a huge mansion which was actually a puny mole Which could really have been a small theme park on his chest. On his back he had a motherboard which was actually a porno-machine which he used to seduce the Queen of Cuba who had a can of beer and a large burger which was fried under the booty of Sangram Mahedra Thombre. The burger was now in Sangu's shite which was eaten by Sai and then he sang Desperado and went to eat jumbo and shat on the floor which smelled like a place of rotten dead bodies. That place was haunted by a spastic whose name was Dickhead Sam. He stared in the famous porn flick called "Prophecies Of Pussy and Dicks".

Beckham was having sex with Puyol when Victoria saw them and got horny so she joined their dicks but the threesome was a disaster so they stopped shagging and started to watch Spongebob. They were bored so they went to a bar to have a cup of ice-cream. Suddenly Kiko Macheda bought ice too and saw them trying to lick each other's ice cream . After the ice-cream melted Kiko went to meet Obama in the toilet where he(Obama) was wanking furiously over Malika Sherwats porn. Kiko was shocked and in trauma started wanking too.

Out of no-where came a beast who looked like Phil Thomson's nose. The beast started to scratch Obama's ass cause Obama wanted change. Danny Boyle saw this and decided to make a movie that involved many twists and turns. He also decided to wipe the floor together with King Kong who went on a rant like Rafa Benitez . He become stressed and in depression he kills himself. In memory of King-Kong Benitez said, "The pleasure I got from banging King-Kong was extremely satisfying but being facht and also fat I couldn't cope with all the hope and expectation of having a good season."

Suddenly a king sized fish called Dufus jumped from a high rock called 'Cock-High'. The fish had a giant head and small eyes like marbles. Obama back on seeing the clown who humped Benitez. When SRK saw this he started shitting in his royal underpants and Aamir started to pee on SRK's dog whose name was Aamir . The dog felt very excited and started peeing on SRK who was Aamir's dog and both were pissing all along and then shat and farted so hard that it blew everyone's ear-drums.

There was a huge building near Mt. Everest where Gary and Phil used to burn scouse related merchandise with gasoline. It was Cantona who started kicking scouse butts by starting a fart which was only affected to make way for Tiger Woods who fucked another bitch and cheated on his gay lover Rohit Verma who liked Sushmita Sen who was married to a pig. The pig was celebrating new year with Mr.America who had a small toe,so small that he couldn't even stand on Meryl Steep's boobs but he had a huge hand which he used to finger Monica-Seles which would give her crabs. Unknowingly the tooth fairy fucked up big time by taking all the teeth of of Mr.America. Now he looked like a douche-bag.

Schumacher suddenly saw that Fernando Alonso was bumming Kimi with his booty like this > but actually he was a bar of nestle chocolate sold by Willie-Wonka who was the owner of the Durex condom company but sold chocolate which was used to make condoms and Viagra too.

The hunters were Chelsea fans and liked Lindsay Lohan and used to fool around liked buffoons searching for gold in Aishwarya Rai's vagina but there was one thing that they couldn't see, her bushy cunt. Because he was wearing a thin condom on his booty which he didn't shave. Somehow Messi heard this and called Xavi and both started shagging the bitch like a huge hippo who got the song 'hips are shite' from Los Del Porto. At once Messi was a crybaby like when he wants some candies.

Meanwhile there was pole dancing going on by VDS and Elin Nodgregen who later went to shag 11 floors of doom. They were crazy like never before and kicked everything around which they made a bonfire and did the naked dance around the swollen tree bark which had penis' hanging on without balls. That was the most disgusting sight ever seen by them but deep inside they knew that it was one of the most bizarre and gay thing that they saw.

The Devil Wears Prada was an awesome crass which they dreamt of in mid-nineties but unfortunately they couldn't release it due to the lack of bollocks and lack of cash for the publicity and mass media coverage. The actress had small boobs which didn't help because The Great Khali is a wuss who actually thinks that Jolie is a circus clown with no boobs still wearing a bra to show off her stuffed cotton. Khali then thought that if he humped Jolie he would not be the only man who would have banged a no-boobed who wears a bra WWE just showed that there can be a no-boobed wrestler who can have a vagina full of sand-paper enzymes.

Then there was that day when we saw a small asteroid with dildo on its back which oozed of cum because it was sexually charged and it didn't wank. The asteroid was really really horny though no-one could satisfy him cause he was insane and he was stupid too. moving while he was trying to balance his cell-phone and football which he was going for. The story turned into a big fracas when Britney was caught on camera naked rubbing oil on her body while peeing and shitting at the window seat of a Maruti 800 having an orgasm by watching gays playing checkers with Bolt,Woods and Steven Gerrard.

It made the world a very happy place to live in when all these slackers, involved in this story, got arrested and paraded naked in hot sun in the Sahara Dessert. Everyone ever born in the world after that lived happily ever after.



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Here was the first one:

Three word story


I'll start let's go!




In a dark.....

cold raining night

a warrior appeared

who had a

white tail between

two of his

hands. His head

was really huge

and looked like

a giant torpedo.

with a penis

and a vagina

and a little

bit of ass

which was swollen

due to fucking

a scouser who

was indulged in

a fight with

Aaron Lennon who

punched a DJ

who was playing

Jingle bells and

suddenly santa claus

had a wank

with the help

of an elf

who also spanked

the living daylights

and stars out